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Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer
belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy. Same goes for any characters from Angel
that should appear. The characters from Friends belong to Bright Kauffman Crane
Productions. Any other characters are mine and may be used for other fanfic
(Just note that they’re mine if you use them.)
Content rating note: This fic is rated PG
Continuity note: This story was written after Destiny and
takes place after season 5 of Angel, assuming Spike is able to ditch Angel. It
also takes place during season 10 of Friends and was written after The One With
The Late Thanksgiving.
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1
Rachel looked around, hoping
to spot her friends at a table and move away from the crowd of people at the
bar. Soon she was being nudged out of the way by thirsty (or maybe just
alcoholic) patrons.
“Okay, *okay*, I’m moving~!”
she said, moving forward in a huff and bumping right into a platinum-blonde guy
at the bar.
“Watch it, luv,” he said.
“Oh, I’m sorry!” she said
placing her hand to her chest and trying to catch her breath. He was gorgeous!
And slightly familiar. “Do I know you?” she asked.
“Anything’s possible,” he
said arching an eyebrow at her and giving her a flirty grin.
Rachel’s mind raced for a
good response when she heard-
“Hey, Rachel! We’re over
here!” Joey stood up and waved for her to come over, with the gleeful
enthusiasm typical of Joey.
Damn you Joey! she thought.
“Coming~!” she said,
mustering up cheer. Turning back to the British guy for a moment, she said,
“Excuse me,” sweetly. Then she beat a hasty path to her friends. As soon as she
was within their earshot and out of his she said, “Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod~!”
“What??” asked Monica.
“There’s this guy~! At the
bar~! And he’s so cute~!” she said, sitting down.
“Ooh, which one?!” asked Phoebe, turning in her chair.
“Whadda’ you care?! You’ve
got a boyfriend!” Rachel said.
“I can still look,”
said Phoebe. “So, which one, which one?”
“It’s that guy in the black
t-shirt and jeans. The one with the platinum-blonde hair,” Rachel said,
pointing in the man’s direction.
“Hey~ It’s Billy Idol~!”
Chandler said, snickering and chuckling.
“Oh! Billy Idol! I thought
he looked familiar,” Rachel said jumping up in her seat a little and clapping
her hands.
“But I don’t think he’s
really Billy Idol,” Phoebe said.
“Hence, my mocking.
Ha-haahg~!” said Chandler, pointing and doing his laugh.
“Yeah. Doesn’t he know that
the 80’s are over?” asked Ross.
“Oh, who cares! He’s *gorgeous*!” said Rachel.
“Oh, totally,” said Monica and
Phoebe.
“So go over there and invite
him over, Rache!” Joey said enthusiastically.
“Really? Do you think he’d
come over?” Rachel asked, her eyes aglow with dating possibilities.
“Of course he would! What man
could resist the invitation of a beautiful lady?” he replied.
“Really? Okay, I’m gonna’ do
it. Wishmeluck!” Rachel leapt up from the table before she could have second
thoughts.
After Rachel trotted away
Ross leaned in closer to Joey and whispered. “Dude! Why do you want her to
invite him over? He looks kinda scary.”
“Well…I figure…if he just looks
like Billy Idol, then maybe he’s an actor and he’s in a TV movie and maybe he
can get me a part.”
Ross rolled his eyes and sat
back in his seat.
“Or maybe he’s just an
incredible dork!” said Chandler, still snickering and bobbing up and
down in his seat with amusement.
“Well, at least he’s an
incredibly sexy dork,” said Phoebe.
“You think he’s sexy?!”
asked Ross.
“Oh, yeah,” Phoebe said,
ogling the man in question.
2
Okay, Rachel. You can do
this.
“Hi~,” she said cheerfully,
catching the man’s attention. “Um, me and my friends were just wondering if you
wanted to join us?”
He gave her a look.
“We, uh…thought you looked, um…nice.
And- and interesting,” she stammered. “We loooove meeting new people.”
“Oh, do you now?”
“Yeah, uh huh, we do.”
He didn’t say anything for a
moment and then shrugged and said, “What the hell, got nothin’ better to do.
Lead the way, pet.”
Rachel giggled. “I love your accent, by the way,” she said as she led him back to her friends.
“Thanks. Get lots of compliments on it,” he said dryly.
“Okay this is everybody,”
she announced when they got to the table. “This is Monica, and Ross, and Chandler,
and Joey, and Phoebe.”
“Hey,” they said.
“Hey,” he replied.
“And everybody this is…I’m
sorry, what’s your name?”
“Spike.”
“You’re name is Spike!?”
Chandler asked, starting to laugh. Then he caught himself. “And it’s a lovely
name,” he added, attempting to look very serious and sincere.
Spike scowled at Chandler
and was then soon distracted by Joey.
“So are you, like, an
actor?” asked Joey.
“No.”
“Impersonator?”
“What? No.”
“So you just dress up like Billy
Idol cause you’re his number one fan~?” asked Chandler.
Spike narrowed his eyes and
said, “Hey, I was dressing like this way before he came on the scene!
It’s my bloody style, you ponce.”
“What the hell’s a ponce?”
asked Chandler.
“Ooh, ooh, I know this one!”
shouted Phoebe. “It means homosexual,” she said with a grin.
“For the love of God,
I am not gay! I can’t believe I’m married and people still
think I’m gay! Did you hear that, Mister British Guy?!! Married!!
Married to a beautiful woman!! This woman right here!! Stand up and tell him
how not gay I am, Monica!”
“You really his wife,” Spike
asked the black-haired woman.
“Yeah,” Monica said. “Afraid
so.”
“I think you need to adjust
his medication.”
Monica smiled nervously and
coaxed Chandler into sitting back down.
“So…what brings you
here…Spike?” Ross asked, hoping to change the subject and keep his friend from
getting beaten in the parking lot.
“M’ here to meet a girl.”
“Oh~ Isn’t that lovely~,” Rachel
said, pouring on the sweetness and then sitting down with pout.
“What’s her name?” Phoebe
asked.
“Buffy.”
“Hey! My last name’s Buffay!
I wonder if we’re related?”
Spike gave her a look and
then looked around at the others. “Is everyone here drinking tainted water?”
“No~,” Joey said,
rolling his eyes. “We’re drinking tap water. Sheesh.” Joey shook his
head.
“All right then…Lovely
meeting you all…I’m just going to go sit back down at the bar now…because
that’s where she’s expecting me…cheers,” Spike said and backed away.
After he was gone, Monica
addressed the group and said, “You do realize, that a guy named Spike,
who is dressed like he belongs on MTV’s ‘I Love The 80’s’, just backed away slowly
from us because we’re too weird.
“But maybe we’re not too weird~
Maybe we’re just not cool enough,” suggested Phoebe.
“Oh, yeah. Cause that’s
better,” snarked Chandler.
“You know…the 80’s are in, actually,” Rachel said.
- The End
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